Caught in the ferocious grip of the ‘what the fuck am I doing with my life’ beast, I was beginning to feel overcome with despair and depression, unable to go on, unable to control my increasing need for melodrama and hyperbole, basically feeling, for want of a better (more dramatic) word, like a piece of shite.

It would seem that no matter what my circumstance or situation, good or bad, employed or jobless, deadbeat or superstar, this rather gross state of mind – felt particularly acutely in the early twenties – could come and bite me in the arse at any time, and on this occasion the little rascal had sunk his teeth in good.

Every time I perused Facebook, Instagram or Twitter, or actually had real life interactions with my friends, I would become riddled with jealousy  at their fortunes and endeavours, and frustrated that my own life seemed to be taking the form of a pit of banana flavoured quick sand (I can’t fucking stand bananas).  In this pessimistic state of mind my success and happiness became relative to everyone elses’ – and everyone knows there is no joy to be had in that way of thinking.

What was I doing with my life?  What should I be doing with my life?  How can I be the best I can be?  What will make me happy?  Should I take up pole dancing or powerboating? All these important and equally suffocating questions filled my brain, overwriting the past year of tremendous successes with an overwhelming sense of failure.  Damn you brain!!!

Then I found out about the women of Johri.

Johri is a tiny village in the Indian state of Uttar Pradesh.  An impoverished town, it only has around 5500 inhabitants, but amongst so few stand two remarkable grandmothers, Prakashi and Chandro Tomar.  Back in 1998 these women defied social, cultural and gender barriers by learning how to shoot at a local range.  Fighting initial resistance from their deeply traditional community, these women have gone on to inspire three generations of female sharpshooters, revolutionising not only the perception of women but their potential too – with many young girls going on to find employment in the Air Force and the Army.  Johri has even produced more than 30 shooters for the Indian Olympic shooting team.

Discover more of their story here.

These women are so utterly inspiring because point blank they did not give a sweet flying fuck what anybody thought of them.

They did not conform to what society dictated, to what their culture deemed appropriate.

They inspired a new generation of women to be independent thinkers and gave them the tools to better themselves and rise up from adversity.

These women are so utterly inspiring because they are so god damn BAD ASS.

The story of these gun-toting grandmas made me realise that my total first-world-tizz was entirely circulated around things – a job title, a holiday, a nicer house, a car.  When, in truth, success is a state of mind.

Success is not a Facebook post, an Instagram pic or an impressive CV – success is building relationships, being happy, smiling, challenging the rules, defying the odds, doing things you love and inspiring others to do the same.

So next time I feel the unmistakable gnawing of the old ‘what am I doing with my life?’ conundrum, I will think of the sharpshooters of Johri and remember these three things:

1. Struggles (even of the first-world variety) are important for you to develop and grow.
2. Believe in yourself – even when society, your bank balance and sometimes friends and family aren’t in your favour.
3. Live life like you’re a mother fuckin’ bad ass.

News story from hindustantimes.com